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Ethel, you got some ‘splainin’ to do

"Fred, this is going to haunt you."

It’s time for the Stupidest People In The World Awards, and once again, for those of you wondering, yes, the bad English and implicit irony therein is intentional.

Today’s winners: Anyone who still takes United Press International or the Washington Times seriously.

UPI was once a major news organization along the lines of the Associated Press; founded in 1907, the wire service once had bureaus in 92 countries. Financial problems began in 1982, and in 2000 it was purchased by the Unification Church, home of Rev. Sun Myung Moon, whose followers are more commonly called “Moonies.” Along with the Washington Times newspaper, UPI is now primarily a fringe propaganda outlet for the Rev. Moon’s political causes, which tend to be far-right wing. Forget Godwin’s Law–Rev. Moon makes the Teabaggers look like the NAACP.

As such, UPI jumps the shark pretty much every day, but a recent UPI story took pandering to its elderly, hyper-conservative, ignorant and superstitious base to a new low:

Researchers seek Vivian Vance’s ghost

STAMFORD, Conn., Sept. 7 (UPI) — A team of paranormal researchers said they are trying to determine whether the ghost of comic actress Vivian Vance is haunting her former home in Connecticut.

That’s right. Somewhere in Connecticut, treated as serious news (there is nothing ironic or intentionally comical about the rest of the story) a team of “experts” is engaged in a scientific attempt to track down the ghost of Ethel Mertz.

That sound you hear in the distance is the whirring of Edward R. Murrow spinning in his grave. The other sound somewhat more distant is the ghost of H.L. Mencken laughing his ass off.

Anyone who regards UPI or the Washington Times as serious news outlets, today’s Stupidest People In The World! And remember to watch this space for more examples of the lowest common denominator.


About Anechoic

we are always asked to understand the other person's viewpoint no matter how out-dated foolish or obnoxious.


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